HEY DADS! Have you ever lost your tools? Have you ever lost your keys?
Your wallet?
Glasses?
Okay, okay, one thing at a time here. I’ve found that when you find yourself with kids you find yourself looking for things. Or misplacing things. Or plain old losing things.
Like your mind.
Sometimes those things turn up and sometimes they don’t. A few years ago I started keeping a list of not-so-odd things that I found in odd places. The thing and the place didn’t match up at all. It happened just the other day again actually so here’s four real-life examples of misplaced items in misplaced places.
Brick in bedroom. Now maybe if you’re really in the doghouse your wife might be hiding something on you but I really hope it doesn’t come to that. This was a brick in my boys’ room. There’s lots of things in there like birds’ nests and sticks and Legos and guitars and shiny rocks. But why a brick? It actually did serve a purpose although I’m not exactly sure how it got up there. Our crooked old farmhouse had old doors on old hinges on old walls so they sometimes swung shut on us. Something heavy like a brick was often needed to prop the doors open on a windy summer day to help cool the indoor atmosphere.
Oatmeal in bathroom sink. Okay I could see how this could happen. Child gets bowl of oatmeal from mother. Child walks away with oatmeal. Child decides it has had enough oatmeal. Child looks for location to dump remaining oatmeal. Child finds bathroom sink. Child returns empty bowl to mother. “I’m done mother.” Case closed.
Diaper in a cup. I literally have nothing to say about this one. Well maybe one thing. Just…why? Why?
GLUE IN LAPTOP COMPUTER PLUG! Needless to say, we haven’t used that computer in a few days. For the life of me I can’t figure out why our 3-year-old son, Arrow, thought this would be a great idea. Maybe he was trying to be helpful so the plug wouldn’t fall out. Maybe he just likes sticking stuff in bottles of glue. So he grabbed a hanging power cable from the laptop and dipped it in the glue and then plugged it back into the computer. At least it won’t fall out now. I remember parents telling us not to stick forks in electrical outlets or toasters. But power cords in glue? Don’t recall that one.
I haven’t even got to the missing tools yet! I guess I’ll continue the list next week.
Remember dads, you can replace all the junk your kids lose or break or misplace but you can’t replace your kids. Actually we watched ”The Sandlot” this week and it turns out you can’t replace an autographed Babe Ruth baseball. But most other stuff is replaceable. I’m trying to be patient with my kids and their oatmeal and their diapers. It’s a challenge. But I think we’re up to it aren’t we? Time flies! Make every moment count!
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